Keegan, the Toilet and The Reason England Supporters Must Treasure This Era

Bog Standard

Toilet humor has long been the reliable retreat of your Daily, and publications remain attentive of notable bog-related stories and historic moments, particularly within football. Readers were entertained to discover that Big Website columnist a well-known presenter has a West Brom-themed urinal in his house. Reflect for a moment for the Barnsley fan who took the rest room somewhat too seriously, and needed rescuing from the vacant Barnsley ground following dozing off in the toilet at half-time during a 2015 defeat against Fleetwood Town. “His footwear was missing and had lost his mobile phone and his hat,” elaborated a Barnsley fire station spokesperson. And who can forget at the pinnacle of his career with Manchester City, the controversial forward popped into a local college for toilet purposes during 2012. “His luxury car was stationed outside, then entered and inquired the location of the toilets, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a pupil informed local Manchester media. “Subsequently he wandered through the school acting like the owner.”

The Restroom Quitting

This Tuesday commemorates a quarter-century since Kevin Keegan stepped down as England manager post a quick discussion within a restroom stall with FA director David Davies in the underground areas of Wembley, subsequent to the memorable 1-0 setback against Germany in 2000 – the Three Lions' last game at the legendary venue. As Davies remembers in his diary, his confidential FA records, he entered the drenched beleaguered England dressing room directly following the fixture, only to find David Beckham in tears and Tony Adams “fired up”, the two stars urging for the director to convince Keegan. Following Dietmar Hamann’s free-kick, Keegan had trudged down the tunnel with a distant gaze, and Davies found him slumped – just as he was at Anfield in 1996 – in the dressing room corner, saying quietly: “I'm leaving. This isn't for me.” Collaring Keegan, Davies attempted urgently to salvage the situation.

“Where on earth could we find [for a chat] that was private?” recalled Davies. “The tunnel? Crawling with television reporters. The locker room? Packed with upset players. The bath area? I couldn’t hold a vital conversation with the national coach while athletes jumped in the pool. Only one option presented itself. The toilet cubicles. A crucial incident in the Three Lions' storied past took place in the vintage restrooms of a stadium facing demolition. The impending destruction could almost be smelled in the air. Pulling Kevin into a stall, I secured the door behind us. We stood there, facing each other. ‘You cannot persuade me,’ Kevin stated. ‘I'm gone. I'm not suitable. I'll announce to journalists that I'm not competent. I'm unable to energize the team. I can’t get the extra bit out of these players that I need.’”

The Results

Consequently, Keegan quit, subsequently confessing he considered his stint as England manager “empty”. The two-time European Footballer of the Year stated: “I found it hard to fill in the time. I ended up coaching the blind squad, the hearing-impaired team, supporting the female team. It’s a very difficult job.” English football has come a long way in the quarter of a century since. Whether for good or bad, those Wembley restrooms and those twin towers have long disappeared, although a German now works in the technical area Keegan previously used. Tuchel's team is considered among the frontrunners for next year’s Geopolitics World Cup: National team followers, value this time. This exact remembrance from a low point in English football serves as a recall that situations weren't always this good.

Real-Time Coverage

Join Luke McLaughlin at 8pm BST for women's football cup news regarding Arsenal versus Lyon.

Quote of the Day

“There we stood in a long row, clad merely in our briefs. We represented Europe's top officials, top sportspeople, examples, grown-ups, parents, determined individuals with strong principles … however all remained silent. We barely looked at each other, our eyes shifted somewhat anxiously as we were summoned forward in pairs. There Collina observed us from top to bottom with a freezing stare. Silent and observant” – former international referee Jonas Eriksson reveals the humiliating procedures match officials were formerly exposed to by previous European football refereeing head Pierluigi Collina.

Soccer Mailbag

“How important is a name? There exists a Dr Seuss poem called ‘Too Many Daves’. Has Blackpool experienced Excessive Steves? Steve Bruce, along with aides Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been removed from their positions. Does this conclude the club's Steve fixation? Not completely! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie continue to manage the main squad. Full Steve ahead!” – John Myles

“Since you've opened the budget and provided some branded items, I've opted to write and make a pithy comment. Postecoglou mentions he initiated altercations in the schoolyard with youngsters he knew would beat him up. This self-punishing inclination must explain his choice to sign with Nottingham Forest. As a lifelong Spurs supporter I will always be grateful for the second-season trophy yet the only follow-up season honor I predict him achieving along the Trent, should he survive that period, is the second tier and that would be a significant battle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|